Friday, November 30, 2012
You Can Be The Difference
Anti-Bully Blog's Quote of the Day
"Make your anger so expensive that no one can afford it and make your happiness so cheap that people can get it for free."
BULLYING PREVENTION TIPS FOR KIDS
If You Are Being Harassed
- Talk to your parents or an adult you can trust, such as a teacher, school counselor, or principal. If the first adult you approach is not receptive, find another adult who will support and help you. There is someone who you can trust.
- It's not useful to blame yourself for a bully's actions. If bullies know they are getting to you, they are likely to torment you more. If at all possible, stay calm, say nothing and walk away. Act confident. Hold your head up, stand up straight, make eye contact, and walk confidently. A bully will be less likely to single you out if your project self-confidence.
- Try to make friends with other students. A bully is more likely to leave you alone if you are with your friends. This is especially true if you and your friends stick up for each other.
- Avoid situations where bullying can happen. If at all possible, avoid being alone with bullies. Be with someone when you walk home or use the restroom.
- Do not resort to violence or carry a gun or other weapon. Carrying a gun will not make you safer.
If Someone Else is Being Harassed
- Refuse to join in if you see someone being bullied.
- If you can do so without risk to your own safety, get a teacher, parent, or other responsible adult to come help immediately.
- Speak up and/or offer support to bullied teens when you witness bullying. If you feel you cannot do this at the time, privately support those being hurt with words of kindness or condolence later. Encourage them to tell someone.
- Always report harassment, even if it is anonymously.
About Cyber-Harassment
Victims of cyber-harassment can be reached anytime and anyplace and often they do not know the perpetrator. Damage done by cyberbullies is equal to other forms of harassment. Some protective tips are:
- Make your user name and online profile anonymous.
- Don't open or read mail by cyberbullies.
- Don't erase messages and show them to an adult you trust.
- If you are threatened with harm, ask and adult to help you call the police.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
8 Anti-Bullying Tips for Students
Anti-Bullying Tip #1: Be an upstander, not a bystander.
- Bystanders walk by and ignore a situation; upstanders pay attention and, if needed, step up to help.
Anti-Bullying Tip #2: Be brave enough to not worry about what people are going to say or think about you.
- Interrupting a moment of bullying takes courage; don’t let fear of what others might say or think about you stop you from doing the right thing.
Anti-Bullying Tip #3: Think about the bigger picture of what it means for the victim and those around you.
- When you step up for and defend someone, you not only protect the person being victimized, you also send a message about how people are treated around you, letting others know that this kind of treatment is not okay.
Anti-Bullying Tip #4: Consider what it would feel like if someone defended you.
- If you see someone getting bullied, think about what it would feel like if that were you. Then think about what it would feel like if someone stepped up for you in that moment.
Anti-Bullying Tip #5: You have the right to stop it.
- You have the right to step in and stop bullying MORE than a bully has the right to intimidate, hurt and scare another person.
Anti-Bullying Tip #6: Don’t put yourself in a dangerous position, and don’t ignore the situation.
- Do not be afraid to go get an adult or someone else nearby to help if it feels like you can’t handle it on your own.
Anti-Bullying Tip #7: If it feels wrong, it probably is.
- If whatever you are witnessing makes you feel uneasy, uncomfortable or bad, it’s probably because whatever’s going on is not okay. Trust your gut instincts.
Anti-Bullying Tip #8: When in doubt, be nice.
- It’s as simple as that. Do the nice thing whenever possible.
Anti-Bully Blog's Quote of the Day
"Ignore the people who talk about you behind your back. That's exactly where they belong, behind your back."
Anti-Bully Blog's Quote of the Day
"Make your anger so expensive that no one can afford it and make your happiness so cheap that people can get it for free."
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Spoken Word Artist Se7en @ Anti-Bullying Rally Performing She Was So Beautiful
"She Was So Beautiful"
How to Stop Bullying on Facebook
Bullying can happen anywhere people congregate and lose their sense of courtesy and boundaries. Facebook is no different given its networking purpose; indeed, bullying on Facebook can cause even more distress and fear than being bullied in real life because the bullying enters your home sanctuary as well, extending both the extent and time frame of bullying.
If you're a victim of bullying on Facebook or you've witnessed it happening, here are some suggestions for stopping the bullying in its tracks.
Make your Facebook account as bully-proof as possible. Be sure to make your settings safe by only letting your known friends see your account and interact with you. If something happens in real life that you think could spill over onto Facebook, consider taking pre-emptive action to remove the problem person before they can try anything. For example, if someone you know from school or work who bullies you there asks you to be their friend, deny the friend request. If they ask you about it in real life, be polite and say that you don't have the time for more than 20 friends and family members and that all the spaces are already filled.
Spot bullying tactics. Bullying can come across in different ways to different people and online it is not always easy to detect a person's real meaning and sometimes you'll need to assess whether or not you're reading too much into something. But some things that might denote bullying on Facebook include:
- Wall posts that say intimidating, mean-spirited, or outright nasty things about you, your friends, and the things you care about. For example: "Marcia, May and me all hate you. You've got really bad breath. Don't bother coming to school tomorrow."
- Consistent abuse about the things you've posted. For example: "Why do you post such STUPID things???? You're a waste of space!!!!"
- Use of lots of punctuation, such as WTF?!!! on a consistent basis, intended to ram home a message without any subtlety.
- Use of ALL CAPITALS can denote a menacing attitude. Online etiquette views most usage of ALL CAPITALS as the equivalent of shouting and if the message is accompanied by negative words or implications, it might be an attempt to bully you.
- Posting photos or videos of you online that are unflattering, that show bullying of you that's happened in real life (for example, phone shots of people roughing you up), or tagging you in photos that suggest negative things.
- They use threatening, harassing, or nasty language in Facebook chat.
- They start a Facebook group based on you, such as something like "10 Reasons to Hate Hermione B".
Look for a pattern. Be sure that the bullying commentary is not just a one-off stupid, petty or insulting comment that was added thoughtlessly. If there is a pattern of leaving nasty messages on your wall, it's obvious that the person doesn't intend to stop. Also consider how this person behaves toward you in real life if you know them in your daily life. Is this something they're carrying over from their everyday behavior?
- Be aware that it's possible for one thing to be enough to establish harassing behavior, such as threatening you, or adding compromising photos of you with suggestive comments, etc.
Tell the bully to stop. Initially, it might be enough to ask the person to stop bothering you. Message them quietly at first. If they keep it up, leave a public request; knowing that your other friends can read it might shame them into ceasing.
- If the bully is someone known to you in a professional capacity, remind them of their need to remain professional in the online sphere. You might do well to remind them that your wall is read by many people too and that other people's perception of them is likely to change if they read anymore of the harassing comments.
Talk to your trusted friends about what is happening. They may be able to leave messages asking the bully to stop as well, and to make it obvious in public that the bully's behavior is unwanted and not tolerated.
- If you're a teen, talk to your parents. Your parents can contact the relevant parents or school and discuss what is happening. They can also consider legal action if the bullying does not cease.
Don't stoop to play their game. You might feel safer responding in kind from the relative "safety" of your computer, but this will only increase the problem, and could result in flame wars and real life confrontation. Ignore their attempts to lure you into responding and block them from being your Facebook friend. Ignoring is usually the best means for deflating a bully's satisfaction.
Report them. There's no need to pussyfoot around if you've been nice and things didn't stop. Report the bullying behavior, activities, and the bully to Facebook administrators. Outline the facts and the impact that the bullying is having on you and request that action be taken, including removal of any bullying posts, groups, or other public elements. Parents can report on behalf of teens; for more information, see Facebook's own instructions at http://www.facebook.com/help/?safety=parents.
- If you have a guidance counselor at school, college, or your workplace, you might consider going to them for help. Ask them for the school, institution, or company policy on bullying and harassment to see whether Facebook is covered. Even if it's not, the substance of the bullying itself should be the subject of an anti-bullying or anti-harassment policy. Find out what you can do to get help and support, and to get the bullying to stop.
- If you're unhappy with the response of a counselor or other person, or of Facebook, consider talking to someone in your local police station for further advice. They may be able to help you directly, or to send you to someone else who can help.
- The police should be involved if you have received physical threats, racial taunts, or if photos or videos of you being mistreated, demeaned, or showing nudity are involved.
Close your Facebook account. If you're really unhappy using the Facebook account and things feel out of control, or you feel over-exposed, consider deleting your Facebook account. You can always open a new account when you're feeling stronger or when you're older.
- Another way to cope may be to open a new Facebook account using a different name, such as your first and middle name. You may need to talk to Facebook administrators about opening an account with a "non-real" name but if bullying is the issue, then you have good grounds for being exempted from the usual name policy.
Don't participate in Facebook bullying yourself. Put a stop to cyber-bullying via Facebook by pointing out when it's wrong and reminding those who participate in it how it harms others, including to the point where some teenagers have killed themselves as a result of bullying in the online environment.
Be prepared to wait for Facebook to erase the bullying groups/pages. You will be probably be waiting a LONG time. It is unfortunate that Facebook does not take their own abuse policy seriously.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
No, It's Not Ok Original By Amber Blu
NO TO BULLYING!!!!! I wrote this song for anyone who's ever been bullied or talked about in a negative way. I was inspired to write this because I can relate to this song like many young kids pre-teens and teens. "NO It's NOT OKAY!!!
Anti-Bully Blog's Quote of the Day
“Like all bullies, they’re cowards underneath the swagger" -Robert Pattinson
10 GOOD WAYS TO TEACH KIDS TO DEAL WITH INSULTS
Kids can be cruel. Name-calling, jokes and teasing are all weapons of choice in the arsenals used in the playground war of words. If your child is the target of insults, you may both rest assured that he is not alone, and it’s more than likely nothing personal. To help him deal with the insults, consider the following 10 ideas:
1. One of the most controversial ways to deal with insults is to give them back. Having a snappy comeback at the ready can often stop teasing in its tracks. Kids often size one another up with teasing; when you have a witty response, the teaser will often back down.
2. If it’s not your child’s nature to give and take insults, another option would be to return kindness for insults. It can be disarming, and leave the other kid feeling kind of crummy. Insults are often used to elicit a certain response from the intended victim. Taking the high road also takes the sport out of the tease for the kid doing the teasing.
3. If possible, your child could avoid the kids that are insulting her. Taunting and put-downs aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, and when they’re especially cruel they aren’t fun for anyone. In those circumstances, the best course of action is to find a group of friends who aren’t so mean.
4. Ignoring the insults is always an option. More often than not, the insults are intended to get attention, usually at someone else’s expense. Nothing defuses a caustic insult quite like letting it go unnoticed.
5. Your child might learn to take the insults less personally if he has the chance to see the situation from a different perspective. It might be fun to watch a comedy where that kind of humor is being used. When your kid sees that it’s just harmless entertainment, he might be less inclined to take insults to heart.
6. Share your own childhood experience about the subject. Tell your kid how you dealt with it, and talk about how it felt to be teased. Knowing you’ve been through the same thing may help her not to feel alone and encourage her to talk about her feelings.
7. Explain to your child that some kids who tell insults are behaving that way because someone else has been mean to them, or because they just don’t know of any better ways to associate with others. Teach her to have compassion for those who can’t express themselves in a more positive and friendly way.
8. If a kid is being overly aggressive, hurtful, or using insults that are of a racial or otherwise insensitive or prejudicial nature, your child should know who to contact should that happen at school. In any case, he needs to know that he can go to you or another adult for help.
9. If the insults are being sent online, your child should know how to avoid websites where the behavior occurs, how to delete or block offending parties, and to advise you if any contact online is causing distress or discomfort.
10. It is always a good idea to have regular discussions with your child about her relationships at school. Doing so can help her to work out any difficulties she’s having. It may require contacting school authorities or speaking directly with the other child’s parents to alleviate the problem.
Article Source: http://www.nannyjobs.org/blog/10-good-ways-to-teach-kids-to-deal-with-insults/http://www.nannyjobs.org/blog/10-good-ways-to-teach-kids-to-deal-with-insults/
Monday, November 26, 2012
Five Tips for Talking to Kids About Bullying
1. Clearly define bullying behaviors. Understand and explain to your child that bullying is a form of violence. Bullying is a way for an individual or group of people to try to have control over someone else. While there are varying degrees, all bullying is physical, verbal, or emotional abuse. Bullying can take many forms including: name-calling, teasing, playing mean jokes, excluding from the group, threatening, telling ugly rumors, taking away personal belongings, cyber bullying, pushing, and hitting.
2. Ask open-ended question to spark conversation. How many times have you asked your child how her day at school went only to receive a terse "fine" or "lousy" and never really learned what happened during her day?
Many times when talking to a child, parents tend to do all or most of the talking. To encourage two-sided conversations, avoid posing questions that can be answered with a simple yes or no. Instead, try to ask your child open-ended questions that get him or her communicating with you. For example, ask questions like "What was the best part of your day today?" and "What was your least favorite part of the day?" Those responses will help open the discussion about your child's experiences, pressures, and feelings, and pave the way for deeper talks about issues such as bullying.
3. Know your child. Also, know what he does in his social life and the friends with whom he spends his time. That doesn't mean snoop through his personal belongings and stalk your child. Simply spend time with him and pay attention when he does share. Don't just hear him talk. Kids sometimes keep bad feelings or run-ins to themselves or only share the less embarrassing parts of the story with parents, so really listen to what your child tells you through his words, behaviors, and body language. Kids unknowingly send off signals that may clue you in to whether or not your child is being bullied or may, in fact, be bullying other kids.
4. Be honest and approachable. Be open with your child about your own past experiences and how you dealt with them. She may not choose to deal with issues in the same way as you, but knowing you can relate will make her feel more comfortable to share her own struggles. Even if you have few stories to share, remind her often that she can come to you about anything. And mean it!
True communication between you and your child also means allowing your child the freedom to voice his or her opinions and experiences. You don't have to like everything you hear. Chances are that you won't, but keep your own feelings and frustrations in check. Don't jump to conclusions, resort to name-calling, or act on your impulse to bully the bully. All you will accomplish with those types of reactions is to teach your child not to come to you the next time there's a problem.
5. Teach by example. This one may not be very popular, but it needs to be said. You can talk to your child about the wrongness and injustice of bullying until your face turns blue, but if you don't set that example in your own life, you send mixed signals to your child. Worse yet, you may be teaching your child how to be a bully or to allow himself to be bullied. Your actions will stick with your child far longer than your words. The most effective way to "talk" to your child about bullying involves much less talking and a lot more action. Lead by example.
Kids learn many of their bad behaviors and habits from watching their parents and following their examples. If your child experiences bullying from you firsthand, sees you acting like a bully to others, or watches you allowing others to bully you, that is what your child learns as acceptable behavior. Pay attention to how you talk to your child and others when he's around, how you allow others to talk to your child and you, and how you deal with your own emotions and frustrations. Your child is watching, listening, and learning.
Heartbeat by Jason G. Ridge (Official Anti-Bullying Charity Single)
Buy the single here: http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/jasongridge
*Part of the proceeds will be donated to Kids Help Phone (Canada)
Watch our Anti-Bullying PSA: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0exyV9k-AoA
Watch our BTS video from the studio: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CA3MYVf9ZFc
Rachel Crow - Mean Girls
Music video by Rachel Crow performing Mean Girls. (C) 2012 Simco Ltd. under exclusive license to Columbia Records, a division of Sony Music Entertainment
iTunes: http://smarturl.it/RachelCrowEP
Amazon: http://smarturl.it/rachelcrowepamazon
Five Tips For Dealing with Cyberbullies
1. Don't respond. Don't retaliate. Tell a trusted adult.
2. Save all evidence. Never delete any communications. Be sure to keep electronic copies and print-outs in case things escalate. Keep records of ISP and law enforcement contacts. Do not alter the electronic communications.
3. If the person who is harassing you continues this behavior, contact their Internet Service Provider (ISP).
4. Save all information that contains even a hint of a threat and contact law enforcement/
5.Block the harasser after you have made copies of all communication.
Anti-Bullying 2012 We're better without bullying
INFORMATION, LINKS and NUMBERS
Beat Bullying
http://www.beatbullying.org/
0845 338 5060
Cyber bullying
http://www.bullying.co.uk/
Samaritans
http://www.samaritans.org/
UK: 08457 90 90 90
ROI: 1850 60 90 90
jo@samaritans.org
Samaritans helpline
0117 983 1000
LGBT support in south west
www.intercomtrust.org.uk
0800 612 3010
helpline@intercomtrust.org.uk
Bullying advice for kids
http://www.kidscape.org.uk/
For free, confidential advice on employment relations problems including bullying,
Monday--Friday, 08:00--20:00 Saturday, 09:00--13:00 tel 08457 47 47 47;
http://www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=1410
Apparently best Australian help site for kids
http://www.kidshelp.com.au/
Bullying in the Workplace
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Employment/ResolvingWorkplaceDisputes/Discriminat...
For emotional support
www.supportline.org.uk
Scottish Anti-Bullying Network
www.antibullying.net
Anti-Bullying Alliance
www.anti-bullyingalliance.org.uk
Childline
www.childline.org.uk
08001111
http://diana-award.org.uk/
All adsense money earned from this video will go towards the Princess Diana Trust: http://diana-award.org.uk/anti-bullying
Thanks to: PointlessBlog, LukeIsNotSexy, hummuswehaveaproblem, TheOliWhiteTV, 3sixty5days, Cherry, Blade376, RayRobertsFilms, doddleoddle, JDandmilk, AbsoluteTwoddle, BertiebertG, musicalbethan, adeanaday, FoodForLouis and Ciaran.
Anti-Bully Blog's Quote of the Day
"I allowed myself to be bullied because I was scared and didn't know how to defend myself. I was bullied until I prevented a new student from being bullied. By standing up for him, I learned to stand up for myself." - Jackie Chan
5 Powerful Tips to Share with your Children to Stop Bullying
Teach your children:
1. Bullying is not OK. Bullying is not genetic, in other words you are not born with it in your DNA. Bullying is not relative to race, culture, or gender, and is a behavior usually taught by someone you love or trust. Bullying is not a right of passage, and is not tolerable under any circumstances.
2. Stop. Walk away. Do not participate if a friend or group of friends are bullying another student. When you’re feeling angry and mean, think about what you’re doing and stop. Take a deep breath, and count to three.
3. Be a friend. Offer yourself as a friend to a student who is being bullied with a smile or kind word. Everybody is special and unique. Find out what makes the student being bullied special.
4. Be brave. If you are very brave, and feel safe, you can tell the bully to stop. You have that right.
5. Ask for help. Go to a trusted adult if you see another student being bullied.
Teach your children that they are powerful beings, and to use their power to respond to bullying in a positive way.
An All too Familiar Story
A anti-bullying PSA brought to you by the COM 381 students at the University of Rhode Island. Stand up to bullying because bullies leave us empty. Think BLUE, we do! Follow us on twitter @URI_goes_BLUE
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Anti Bullying Song By Leah 14 Year Old Girl- Dedicated to Amanda Todd
This song was inspired by Amanda Todd and it is for all of the victims of bullying. It is at first sung from the victims view and how they feel and then near the close of the song it asks the bully how they feel now that they have completely destroyed someone. PLEASE STOP BULLYING!!!! Here's the lyrics: Lonley, Lonely
(Chorus)
How would you feel if you were the one everybody hated
How would you feel if you were the one who thought their life was wasted
How would you feel, How would you feel oh oh
How would you feel, How would you feel oh oh
Lonely,Lonely
(Verse#1)
She walks around all by herself
Desperately waiting for someone's help
Feeling pointless, Feeling dead
Wanting to run and never look back
Lonely, Lonely
How would you feel if you were the one everybody hated
How would you feel if you were the one who thought their life was wasted
How would you feel, How would you feel oh oh
How would you feel, How would you feel oh oh
Lonely, Lonely
She comes home tears run down her face
Wants to get out of this painful place
Betrayed and broken she makes her plan
She hopes her loved ones will understand
Full of pills and full of pain
Takes a last look at this empty place
Lonely, Lonely
How do you feel now that you've killed a tortured child
How do you feel now that you've knocked someone who's already down
How do you feel feel oh oh
How do you feel feel oh oh
Lonely, Lonely, Lonely,.......Lonely
Thursday, November 1, 2012
20 Top Tips for Parents If Your Child Is Being Bullied
Bullying effects so many families, and for many parents this can mean a frustrating and painful time to help their child get through this. Below is just a quick list of things you can do to help your child, remember that what works with one child may not work with another, so here are 20 things to try:
20 Tips for Parents:
1- Encourage your child to report any bullying incidents to you.
2- Validate your child's feelings. It is normal for your child to feel hurt, sad, and angry.
3- Ask your child how he/she has tried to stop the bullying. Asking questions is a wonderful way to have your child do the thinking.
4- Ask how is he/she going to solve this. We want the child to do the thinking before we jump in. See how many options he can come up with.
5- Coach your child in alternatives. Ideally the best solution is having your child solve this without anyone interfering. Most of the time unfortunately, this isn't possible. Share these strategies: avoidance is often an excellent strategy, playing in a different place, play a different game, stay near a supervisor, look for new friends, join social activities outside of school.
6- Talk with your child's teacher. Make sure they are aware of what is going on.
7- Encourage your child to seek help from other school personnel.
8- Volunteer to help supervise activities at school.
9- Do not ignore your child's reports. Ignoring them sends the wrong message.
10- Do not confront the bully or the bullies' family.
11- Teach your child how to defend him or herself.
12- Teach self-respect.
13- Give numerous positive comments to your child.
14- Avoid labeling or name-calling.
15- Let your child know it is okay to express their anger. There are positive and negative ways to express anger, we want to teach and model the positive ways.
16- Let your children stand up to you now and then. It makes it more likely they will stand up to a bully.
17- Stress the importance of body language.
18- Teach your child to use 'I' statements.
19- Teach positive self-talk
20- Teach how to use humor, 'out crazy' them. For example, if the bully says to Keith, "Hey, boy you're ugly." Keith can respond in a couple different ways:
"Thanks for sharing"
"Yes, I know, I always have been"
"Yes, today's lunch was disgusting" then walk away.
There is many other aspects of bullying to look at: Why your child is the victim, why people bully, what you child can do if he/she is bullied, signs your child is being bullied, what the schools should be doing, handling the school bus issues. All of these are addressed in The Shameful Epidemic, How to protect your child from bullies and school violence.
Taken from article by by Derek and Gail Randel M.D
Anti-Bully Blog's Quote Of The Day
"You will spend your lives trying to figure out how to keep others down because it makes you feel more important. There is a big world out there bigger than prom, bigger than high school. It won't matter if you were the prom queen or the quarterback of the football team or the biggest nerd in the school. Find out who you are and try not to be afraid of it." -Drew Barrymore
